C'mon! I've only got 3 address replies since my last post!
Fine, I'll get the ball rolling.
Na's address:
Attn: Sheena Ng
Union College
38 Upland Road
St. Lucia Q4067
So there, now you got mine, I need yours.
I'll only get photos of the Beautiful Brisbane up only when I get at least 5 more addresses!
Until then, you'll only see letters. >.<
My dear friend finally decides to blog again, and I see her typing like so many other non-korean k-pop fans with the korean text for laughing and emotexts like T.T and etc.
Speaking of K-pop fan, bad news for all the Anti-Sheena-Loves-TVXQ mates out there, cuz Na found an Extreme K-pop Lover Singaporean who's moving into my college during O-week. (She wants to stay with her mom for now, so she's like in a hotel now.)
She goes to Soompi, Youtube, and download Kpop videos just like Me!!
Except that her fandom is not restricted to TVXQ only, but all of K-pop.
I'm a Mega TVXQ fan, which ultimately leads to me become a part of Kpop and a little Jpop fan as well, so we Click!
Wahahahaha!!!
She's passing me some chi subbed (gosh! this wld be the way to maintain my mandarin standards) SS501 videos and whatever else she has.
SHE HATES SOSHI TOO!!!
rofl!!
2 days and I've used 100mb w/o videos, just RSS Feeds of my TVXQ (& Kpop) updates. Some used on my Singapore Sweethearts' blogs and msn v-call home and on www.cna for my only way to keep myself connected to Sg and Asia.
That's quite an accomplishment!
Therefore, I'm gonna reward myself by sparing 50mb tonight or tmr for Youtubing.
*Big Smiles*
I can't wait!
Not forgetting that I'm NOT gonna miss out on DL-ing TVXQ's coming soon single next week, which I'll make a 10mb allowance, just in case.
I've been anticipating it for soooo long!
I can't miss it, never!
It's 10mins to 12nn here in Brisbane, although I know it says I blogged this 2hrs earlier, that because I didn't adjust the time in my blogger.
I'm heading down to the City and grab myself a few Krispy Kremes for the weekend.
Wahahaha!
I see jealous souls!
Until then!
Addresses People!!!!
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Internet Checked
Like finally! I'm connected.
and some1 finally came to fix the cranky heater, which is only 1.5 times warmer than b4.
Australians *Sigh*
Anyways, just wanna ask all my Singapore Sweethearts to email me your home address (with postal code please) asap!
If you've no idea if you fall under my Singapore Sweethearts category, those who sent me off at the airport (inclusive of those who only send me off with an SMS or msgs) are qualified.
The others like my Dong Bang Friends, TB12 smarties and Queensway oldies (who knows that I'm in Brisbane) are also included.
Hurry and email me your address like RIGHT NOW!
Please don't wait for me to send an invitation to you personally cuz it really eats up my download limit.
Thanks in advance!!
and some1 finally came to fix the cranky heater, which is only 1.5 times warmer than b4.
Australians *Sigh*
Anyways, just wanna ask all my Singapore Sweethearts to email me your home address (with postal code please) asap!
If you've no idea if you fall under my Singapore Sweethearts category, those who sent me off at the airport (inclusive of those who only send me off with an SMS or msgs) are qualified.
The others like my Dong Bang Friends, TB12 smarties and Queensway oldies (who knows that I'm in Brisbane) are also included.
Hurry and email me your address like RIGHT NOW!
Please don't wait for me to send an invitation to you personally cuz it really eats up my download limit.
Thanks in advance!!
Offline Updates
The following entries were written before I’ve got my internet connection in my college:
G’day Mate!
8th July, 2008
It’s my 8th day in Brisbane and I still don’t have internet. I’m writing this in Words so I can copy them later when I finally get connected. It’s like a delayed-publicized diary.
I’m still trying to figure out the weather pattern here in Brisbane, cuz it can rain heavily today, sunny drizzle tmr, and rain again the next day. And it really freezes when it rains!
(Frankly speaking, with my “toilet-comfort-recognition-system” embedded in my ass since I was little, I was once worried about getting constipated if I were to use common toilets.)
But there are cons that come along because the common toilet is where your neighbours interact and get to know each other, which I’ll miss out and thus, after so many days in the college, I haven’t found any friends to hang out with. They’re all just acquaintance who I’ll meet during meals.
My mom was like, “Haiya! Then you just go idle around the common toilet more often lar!”
Like WTH!? That’ll make me look desperate! And I’m surviving just nice with the laptop and radio in my room. It just gets alittle lonely and awkward when it comes to meal times,but that’s it, it’s really no big deal since I’m kinda enjoying the solitude. :D
When I was on the plane to Brisbane, it suddenly struck me that the reason why I have less (nearly no) excitement about studying in Brisbane is because, the idea of schooling overseas is kinda glued into my head since the day I’ve set my mind to apply for an overseas uni. The fact that I’ve been holidaying every year with my family has kinda numbed my anticipation for travelling, especially when this is my 3rd time in Australia.
I think I’d be a lot more excited if I’m going to places like Europe, US or… hahas… S.Korea (or maybe Japan; depending on where my lovelies are). =D
Speaking of my lovelies, since the day I arrived, I’ve not been updated with their news AT ALL. Other than sab’s sms about Super Junior performing on MTVasia Awards, which I’ll miss (like a lot of other things), no Kpop news at all. I’m hanging onto my TVXQ with the few videos and performances I’ve saved in my laptop.
Of course, the school/college is not that cruel as to tie us down with the meager download limit, but if I do want more downloads, I’ll have to pay A$10 for each extra 1gb.
Grrr!
I’ve spent so much this week on stuff for my room, I’ll need to thrift for the rest of the month and maybe next month too. This extra expense will have to wait, and thus my Kpop and TVXQ darlings as well.
I finally realize how fortunate Singaporeans are, with unlimited broadband, wireless at such a reasonable price.
So stop complaining about how expensive your internet bills are because with the amount you download a month, you’ll be spending 10times more here in Brisbane.
(It’s really like what you see on TV. The ang-mohs sitting on a grass field, reading and eating kind of environment.)
9th July, 2008
Still no connection.
Argh! Super Suay (as in unlucky)!!!!
Before coming to Brisbane, I kinda knew that there’s a high possibility that I’m gonna have restricted internet access, thus I downloaded a few stuff to stock up.
I was so busy before departure, so I didn’t check the files and when I finally decided to watch the videos, I found 1 out of sync, and another TVXQ Malaysian Concert Video totally unenjoyable because that’s the concert where Yunho hurt his back and couldn’t dance as much. *Pulls Hair*
I am so deprived of Yunho right now, and I don’t really feel like watching the old videos, because you have no idea how many times I’ve rewatched them.
I NEED NEW VIDEOS!! But I can’t… )=
Erm… yea, since school hasn’t started and my floor (as in the level I’m living on) is pretty vacant, I don’t have much to do (except for cleaning up and tidying my room, which I’m too lazy to), which is why I’m writing these delayed-publicized diaries to kill time.
But like my mom says, “It’s only for these 2weeks, because when school starts, I’d be expecting you to be studying and revising every night.”
Hmm… yea sure. I’m not sure if that’s really gonna happen because in 20years of my life, that has never occurred a single time at all. I mean, I don’t even do it when she’s around, so what makes her think that it would be different when I’m in Brisbane without her supervision? This is absurd. But if it really happens, look up the sky for shooting stars, cuz you’ll know that a miracle is about to appear.
Okays, back to (old) video watching again. Janice (as in Zeewee’s friend, not the TB12 Janice ß I need to make that clear bcuz the 2 Janices are worlds apart) just arrived yesterday, so I gave her time to settle down in her apartment. We’re gonna meet up later and catch up on everything. She’s gonna tell me all the big news in Singapore, and I’m gonna guide her on how to lead an amateur life in Brisbane.
I miss Singapore’s 30 degree Celsius. I really do.
I just wanna stay indoors
9th July 2008
My 2nd entry for the day, and I’m here because it’s just too cold to go outdoors. I brought Janice and Jammie into the campus, made their student IDs and visited the BEL (BizEconsLaw) Faculty. By then, my hands were frozen numb and I couldn’t wait to get back into my room and sit beside the heater.
I actually planned to do the laundry this evening, but it was just waaay too cold to just walk down a few flight of stairs to the laundry room, but I still did it after dinner when I’m all filled up and feeling slightly warmer inside my body.
Laundry is scary… especially when you have no idea if the colour would run on the dark coloured clothings… I feel like I’m experimenting life every second since I arrived in Brisbane.
Australians are super inefficient people.
When people tell me how laid back and slow a life of an Australian is, I didn’t think it would be that bad, until now.
I gave feedback about my lousy old heater to the college office 3 days ago, but nothing is fixed yet.
I submitted my internet connection form 3 days ago, and I’m still not connected.
Just an hour ago, I found out that a girl on my floor who moved in 2 days later than me got her internet up already. WHAT THE HELL!!!!
According to her, she went to the office for help to get her MAC address, and they conveniently set it up for her.
So, she advised me to ask the office tmr about my internet connection status.
This is soooo annoying.
I’ve also been asking around… according to the seniors in the college, the weather forecasted that it’s gonna get windy for the next few weeks, and today is probably the first day of the winds.
Suddenly I feel like I’ve underestimated the weather in Australia. It’s in fact a lot more temperamental than the skies of Singapore. Yea, the list gets pretty impressive as the days pass. Oh! And apparently NOT ALL the shops close at 5pm in Australia. In colleges, there are usually events and parties during the semester. And according to the seniors, these events and parties are all about getting drunk and thrashed. Yeps, it’s kinda worrying my dear mother. I had to assure and reassure her that I’m gonna practice Heap Loads of Self-Discipline to calm her nerves. Anyways, normally from Thursday onwards until the weekend, pubs do open till really late, and that’s where everyone hangs out. Believe it or not, there are pubs in the school campus, which gets really packed when school starts. Erm… if you’re lucky, my sweethearts in Singapore will probably find a new friend who can really hold her liquor when I return. (=
List of countries my new acquaintances are from:
1. Melbourne
2. Malaysia
3. Thailand
4. China
5. Canada
6. Germany
7. Scotland
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
The Exception
Since I'm always seen as a person without troubles and I'm presumed to have a life of comfort, I'd be assumed to have no worries in life.
But they often fail to learn that the life of an adult is alot more complicated than a child. As one gains in age, the mind starts to get complex and creates problems on its own.
Therefore, don't think that I live a smooth-sailing life and that would make me the least worrisome person you know.
I've tried to suppress the feeling of being neglected once at home, which then blew up into frustrations and jealousy. And it seems like with my personality and character, I can never run away from situations like this.
When I finally feel like I found the person whom I can throw all my sorrows safely at, I had to leave that person for a long time. I am left with no choice but to hold back the pleasure it brings me to vomit all my discomfort out and learn to live my old life back.
This person pampered me with the habit of speaking my mind and not mindful of the consequences if anything gets leaked out because I know it will never happen. It's been wonderful knowing you, and yes, this honored person is an exception.
Thank you for being there.
I hope that we won't feel too distant the next time we meet and we can still remain close friends again.
P.S. This kinda sounds like a break-up.
But they often fail to learn that the life of an adult is alot more complicated than a child. As one gains in age, the mind starts to get complex and creates problems on its own.
Therefore, don't think that I live a smooth-sailing life and that would make me the least worrisome person you know.
I've tried to suppress the feeling of being neglected once at home, which then blew up into frustrations and jealousy. And it seems like with my personality and character, I can never run away from situations like this.
When I finally feel like I found the person whom I can throw all my sorrows safely at, I had to leave that person for a long time. I am left with no choice but to hold back the pleasure it brings me to vomit all my discomfort out and learn to live my old life back.
This person pampered me with the habit of speaking my mind and not mindful of the consequences if anything gets leaked out because I know it will never happen. It's been wonderful knowing you, and yes, this honored person is an exception.
Thank you for being there.
I hope that we won't feel too distant the next time we meet and we can still remain close friends again.
P.S. This kinda sounds like a break-up.
Scars will trail behind (The Insignificant Soul)
For the past one month, I find myself drowning in disappointment caused by the people around me and to add on to that, I felt immersed in high-blood-pressure stress level because of my mother.
I don't blame my mother, because I can see her blood pressure soaring higher than mine as the departure date draws nearer. It came as a shock to her that I was really serious about studying abroad alone, and without getting mentally prepared in time for her daughter's first grown-up decision, she finds herself worrying about my basic survival necessities in Australia.
But I don't see any effort put in by the rest of the people around me. I feel myself surrounded in sheer superficial "Miss Yous" and meet-ups.
For one entire month, I realised how I was used as an excuse for gatherings and more gatherings, where my existence seemed unimportant.
Or if I was in any way important, I was there to keep things planned and organised so that everyone is fed and happy.
I don't see other people's farewells as servitude as mine.
Everyday, as I savour the solitude moments that have been so hard to come by lately, my mind would drift to the antagonising socialising work I've been trying to keep up with ever since I was planning to leave Australia.
I find it unbelievable that after so long, I still ended up feeling let down by the people whom I thought I could keep forever.
And when I look back, I realise that I had a part to play in the blame.
The non-existence of the word Trust landed me here, as I see the true colours of my life before leaving this made up world of my own.
In actual fact, I never trusted anyone, and nobody realised that that problem actually existed.
I've never poured my sorrows to anyone, neither has anyone tried to look here for a shoulder to cry on.
I am not the first person to share your joy with, neither are you the first person I wanna announce my good news to.
Whatever happened to the "I don't believe in Best Friends" theory I've been working on since Primary School. It seems that after I've learnt to change myself, I'm slowly forgetting the scars that were left by all those whom I thought I could trust, and thus, letting my guard down.
I've never let myself feel love from friends only until recently, when I got pricked which woke me into reality.
As I sit here alone, thinking back on all the bitter and sweet I've encountered in life, I realise that I've not told anyone the bitterness in my life, and I find myself holding back whenever I want to spread any good news. It's not that I don't wish to say anything, but many times, in order to prevent more trouble or best, status quo, I had to keep mum.
Just like now. By writing this, I'm making trouble for myself, but it's okay, because it's between me and each individual and I'm leaving already, so there won't be any more talkings to blow the matter up. Right?
So I asked myself, "Do these people actually know me?"
Now I finally saw the light of everything.
The farewell is for the girl who is always there when you need her. Just ring her up, say please and she'll turn up for all the bored souls who needs a companion.
Everyone must admit that I'm not a fun person to hang out with, so when I do get a call, they just needed more people to fill up the space, or otherwise, it would be that all the fun people are busy.
That's that.
They'll miss the "make-use-of" girl, whom they don't actually understand but they think they do.
All the "we really want you to be there" mentality makes me wonder if I'm being called up because it became a habit.
Because in so many occasions, I've tried and experimented: If I don't speak up and make any sound, will anyone notice?
Apparently, it's proven that No, no one noticed.
I wrote this a week before my departure, but I'm only posting it out now because I don't wanna see all the guilt-strickened, disappointed, sad faces like as if those faces are telling me that I should be guilty of feeling that way and I should really change my mindset.
Please do take a few moments and ponder. Do you really have no part to play in this whole ordeal I'm going through in my mind?
and whatever your answer is for that question, ask yourself: "Do you really know what kind of a person Sheena Ng really is?"
Whether your answer is a Yes or a No, it doesn't matter to me. Because right from the start of the entire Farewell Sheena Affair, I saw who are the ones who truly loves me as a friend and I sincerely appreciate everyone of them.
People may have saw the change in me, but they don't realise how the change made me distant and different.
As for those not in my list, just 2 more lines for all of you:
I'm sick of me giving and you not reciprocating because I'm not that magnanimous.
Therefore, I won't bother giving anymore unless there's a need to.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Alright. Take in deep breaths and relax.
I've written this because I was too stressed up.
But that doesn't mean I don't mean what I say.
If it didn't matter then it wouldn't hurt so much.
So friends still mean alot to me, just in a different way.
And I'm sure nobody realised, but I've learned to live and forget since a looong time ago, and also, I dont think anybody really know that the line "Time will heal all wounds, scars will trail behind" really applies in my life.
(Although I know it's kinda impossible) Don't let the above passage bother you too much, as Time will solve everything. Wounds will definitely heal in time, but scars remain.
I don't know about you (apply to all readers) reading this, but I've become an optimistic person who cheers up in minutes.
That's something you learn about me. :)
An independent soul is what I've become right now.
That's why I say I don't need a farewell. It'd only make my already dreadful soul feel worse, but I'm not blaming anybody since I've never told anyone and nobody actually noticed.
I don't blame my mother, because I can see her blood pressure soaring higher than mine as the departure date draws nearer. It came as a shock to her that I was really serious about studying abroad alone, and without getting mentally prepared in time for her daughter's first grown-up decision, she finds herself worrying about my basic survival necessities in Australia.
But I don't see any effort put in by the rest of the people around me. I feel myself surrounded in sheer superficial "Miss Yous" and meet-ups.
For one entire month, I realised how I was used as an excuse for gatherings and more gatherings, where my existence seemed unimportant.
Or if I was in any way important, I was there to keep things planned and organised so that everyone is fed and happy.
I don't see other people's farewells as servitude as mine.
Everyday, as I savour the solitude moments that have been so hard to come by lately, my mind would drift to the antagonising socialising work I've been trying to keep up with ever since I was planning to leave Australia.
I find it unbelievable that after so long, I still ended up feeling let down by the people whom I thought I could keep forever.
And when I look back, I realise that I had a part to play in the blame.
The non-existence of the word Trust landed me here, as I see the true colours of my life before leaving this made up world of my own.
In actual fact, I never trusted anyone, and nobody realised that that problem actually existed.
I've never poured my sorrows to anyone, neither has anyone tried to look here for a shoulder to cry on.
I am not the first person to share your joy with, neither are you the first person I wanna announce my good news to.
Whatever happened to the "I don't believe in Best Friends" theory I've been working on since Primary School. It seems that after I've learnt to change myself, I'm slowly forgetting the scars that were left by all those whom I thought I could trust, and thus, letting my guard down.
I've never let myself feel love from friends only until recently, when I got pricked which woke me into reality.
As I sit here alone, thinking back on all the bitter and sweet I've encountered in life, I realise that I've not told anyone the bitterness in my life, and I find myself holding back whenever I want to spread any good news. It's not that I don't wish to say anything, but many times, in order to prevent more trouble or best, status quo, I had to keep mum.
Just like now. By writing this, I'm making trouble for myself, but it's okay, because it's between me and each individual and I'm leaving already, so there won't be any more talkings to blow the matter up. Right?
So I asked myself, "Do these people actually know me?"
Now I finally saw the light of everything.
The farewell is for the girl who is always there when you need her. Just ring her up, say please and she'll turn up for all the bored souls who needs a companion.
Everyone must admit that I'm not a fun person to hang out with, so when I do get a call, they just needed more people to fill up the space, or otherwise, it would be that all the fun people are busy.
That's that.
They'll miss the "make-use-of" girl, whom they don't actually understand but they think they do.
All the "we really want you to be there" mentality makes me wonder if I'm being called up because it became a habit.
Because in so many occasions, I've tried and experimented: If I don't speak up and make any sound, will anyone notice?
Apparently, it's proven that No, no one noticed.
I wrote this a week before my departure, but I'm only posting it out now because I don't wanna see all the guilt-strickened, disappointed, sad faces like as if those faces are telling me that I should be guilty of feeling that way and I should really change my mindset.
Please do take a few moments and ponder. Do you really have no part to play in this whole ordeal I'm going through in my mind?
and whatever your answer is for that question, ask yourself: "Do you really know what kind of a person Sheena Ng really is?"
Whether your answer is a Yes or a No, it doesn't matter to me. Because right from the start of the entire Farewell Sheena Affair, I saw who are the ones who truly loves me as a friend and I sincerely appreciate everyone of them.
People may have saw the change in me, but they don't realise how the change made me distant and different.
As for those not in my list, just 2 more lines for all of you:
I'm sick of me giving and you not reciprocating because I'm not that magnanimous.
Therefore, I won't bother giving anymore unless there's a need to.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Alright. Take in deep breaths and relax.
I've written this because I was too stressed up.
But that doesn't mean I don't mean what I say.
If it didn't matter then it wouldn't hurt so much.
So friends still mean alot to me, just in a different way.
And I'm sure nobody realised, but I've learned to live and forget since a looong time ago, and also, I dont think anybody really know that the line "Time will heal all wounds, scars will trail behind" really applies in my life.
(Although I know it's kinda impossible) Don't let the above passage bother you too much, as Time will solve everything. Wounds will definitely heal in time, but scars remain.
I don't know about you (apply to all readers) reading this, but I've become an optimistic person who cheers up in minutes.
That's something you learn about me. :)
An independent soul is what I've become right now.
That's why I say I don't need a farewell. It'd only make my already dreadful soul feel worse, but I'm not blaming anybody since I've never told anyone and nobody actually noticed.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
This kid is good!
Yikes!
A 14 year old who has the moves!
Okays, I'm referring to the kid in the front at the start of the performance.
Freaking hell after I've watched the video, I don't believe that this kid is just 14 this year!
Korea stars debut really early these days...
I didn't know them before, but I went to wiki them straight after watching this video to find out who's that kid in the front.
This is what I found in wiki:
TAEMIN
Stage name: Taemin (태민 or 泰民)
Birth name: Lee Taemin (이태민)
Birth date: July 18, 1993(age 14)
Position: Lead Dancer, Vocal
This 14 year old kid w/o a picture in wiki is the lead dancer of Shinee (pronounced as Shiny - yes, koreans and their english...), which means it's that kid in the front of the formation, cuz judging from SM's habits, they ALWAYS put the lead dancer in the front, whether or not they can sing.
It applies to SuJu, TVXQ (and previously Shinhwa).
Anyways, this kid's dancing style reminds me of Eunhyuk/Donghae (and alittle Junsu). But also different at the same time..
Erm.... no. He does not remind me of Yunho at all because Yunho's dancing style is unique to his own. Period.
Oh, and I've finally come to terms with the rumours about Shinee being the new TVXQ from the "SM Super Star Factory".
Their Chris Brown performance is pretty tight. I can't deny that they probably have what it takes in the future to make it big like their sunbaes.
Haven't really heard them sing though, they might not be as good. Afterall, Junsu and Jaejoong are Vocal Powerhouses.
But I must say, the lead vocal of Shinee, Jonghyun (the kid who sang the most in this perf.) is pretty cute.
Other than that, the others should try re-styling themselves.
A 14 year old who has the moves!
Okays, I'm referring to the kid in the front at the start of the performance.
Freaking hell after I've watched the video, I don't believe that this kid is just 14 this year!
Korea stars debut really early these days...
I didn't know them before, but I went to wiki them straight after watching this video to find out who's that kid in the front.
This is what I found in wiki:
TAEMIN
Stage name: Taemin (태민 or 泰民)
Birth name: Lee Taemin (이태민)
Birth date: July 18, 1993(age 14)
Position: Lead Dancer, Vocal
This 14 year old kid w/o a picture in wiki is the lead dancer of Shinee (pronounced as Shiny - yes, koreans and their english...), which means it's that kid in the front of the formation, cuz judging from SM's habits, they ALWAYS put the lead dancer in the front, whether or not they can sing.
It applies to SuJu, TVXQ (and previously Shinhwa).
Anyways, this kid's dancing style reminds me of Eunhyuk/Donghae (and alittle Junsu). But also different at the same time..
Erm.... no. He does not remind me of Yunho at all because Yunho's dancing style is unique to his own. Period.
Oh, and I've finally come to terms with the rumours about Shinee being the new TVXQ from the "SM Super Star Factory".
Their Chris Brown performance is pretty tight. I can't deny that they probably have what it takes in the future to make it big like their sunbaes.
Haven't really heard them sing though, they might not be as good. Afterall, Junsu and Jaejoong are Vocal Powerhouses.
But I must say, the lead vocal of Shinee, Jonghyun (the kid who sang the most in this perf.) is pretty cute.
Other than that, the others should try re-styling themselves.
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