Day Two of Intership

I spent 3/4 of today in NTU. It's my first time in NTU and I think it's a very perculia place.

Firstly, the place is so inaccessible. I won't be surprised that the students are always late.

Secondly, the building is obviously above the gound, but the levels of the building are all labelled as basement. It's really confusing as to which is upstairs and which is downstairs. I was at B4 and wanted to go up, I pressed B5. Grrr.... The achitect has a really weird logic.

Third, the rooms look like a hospital. The staff rooms are like staff A wards, each staff one ward. The classrooms are like the class B and C wards. There's a funny feeling when I'm trying to navigate.

Some of you might be wondering, isn't my co. suppose to be in NUS? Yea.. u're not wrong, but NTU is a client of my co. and I was there for a meeting. YEap, 1st day and I'm required to meet clients and take minutes of meeting.

But so far, there's alot of data entry work to do... I suspect after I'm done with this, I will be asked to do telemarketing, or whatever it's called. Market my company's products to potential clients by calling one by one by one by one by one by one by one... which will take forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever.............

Fixed.

My laptop is finally back on track. Well, it seems like there was a problem with the motherboard. The repairman actually stripped my laptop totally naked! If I had a camera, or a phone with a camera, I would have taken a picture to show u my naked laptop. But too bad, I don't have a phone yet.
Shite.
It's not that I blaming anyone, but I was promised a new phone quite sometime ago. I know my dad's really busy and everything, but it has been awhile. This temp phone I'm using is really cranky. Sometimes it works, sometimes it decides to turn off. Especially when I'm talking on the phone! Grrr...

Lappie Down

My Laptop is currently down. Power problem again. It's either the adapter's fault or the battery's broken. I suspect its both, but no matter what's the problem, i'll get a new battery and fix the power connectivity point on my laptop. Both are rusty already.

I feel super handicap now. No handphone. No laptop. What's next? Grrr... That's why I insist on durability when it comes to gadgets.

I might be setting up a charity drive. Donate money generously! All the proceeds will go to the sheena-needs-a-new-laptop organisation. This is a goodwill organisation that will organise an event to purchase a durable laptop with up-to-date technology. This is a very meaningful event, as it will eventually contribute to the mind of Sheena, who will inturn contribute to the society. Your kindness is greatly appreciated. Thank you!

National Geographic Live Show

Just 15mins ago, I saw a live performance of sex!! OMG!!! If I had a camera, I would have shared it with all of you.

The relationship between this couple is complicated. Let me explain to you in details.

Once upon a time, Mother was strolling on the road when a stranger approach her. There were sparks between them. The stranger got horny and aroused Mother. They begin to have sex in the middle of nowhere.

Mother forgot to practice safe sex, and accidentally gave birth to a few babies. She regrets her mistake and abandoned the babies. A nearby resident took pity of the babies and decided to feed them, take care of their daily meals.

A few months later, the babies grew up and are full fledge adults. Due to lack of education and parentless discipline, brother and sister were not taught family planning.
Just 20mins ago, both got horny and decided to have sex. Sister saw me approaching and became very shy and stood up and hide under a car when the brother was still humping her.

I freaked out.

My neighbourhood will have a new little of kittens, and soon, this place will be flooded by cats and I'll be prepared to call the catbusters to eliminate them one by one.

Costa Sand Resort - Downtown East

This is a study camp, but we end up having a go-crazy-and-eat-and-drink-a lot camp.

I am quite sure I've gained back all the weight I've lost and more. But just a little more, because I worked out! Yes! Went swimming for an hour. Enough workout to start my exercising ball rolling.

Well, visit here to check out the details of my study camp: http://typhoidalogy.blogspot.com/2006_08_01_typhoidalogy_archive.html -- Shan's blog.
And here for a little bit more peeks of our trip: http://thisishowitstarted.blogspot.com/2006_08_01_thisishowitstarted_archive.html -- Zw's blog.

Then after the camp, we stopped by elaine's house for more mugging! and Uno! lol! Well, the main reason was for the Uno, cuz we played it from Kembangan station to Redhill station, to the bus stop and then to the bus. Everyone had their eyes on us, watching our match. Elaine didn't have much luck, despite her popularity with the red cards. Maybe its because Zw wasn't there to intercept her cards and pass her some luck - so she says.
We still don't have enough fun, so we decided to go to elaine's house for one last hour of Uno and then back to hit the books.
I fell asleep while reading, but woke up just in time at 5pm for chU.

So, I'm finally home, took a super duper Uber long bath.
There will always be 2 things I'll definitely miss when I leave house for long.

1. MY bed
2. MY toilet - Shower
- Toilet Bowl
- Basin/Sink

Yeap.. I can't sleep well on other beds, not even my mom's bed or my brother's beds. I'm too attached to my bed. And if my mom ever buys a new bedsheet, it'll take me awhile to get used to it, so all my bedsheets are rather old ( i refuse to get them changed).

I can't live without my toilet for too long. Everything I need is there. And my tushi recognise only my toilet bowl. It doesn't accept any other toilet bowl, not even the one in my mom's toilet. I cannot live without it. I think its very much the environment I am in.. my tushi likes the toilet bowl in my toilet.

Death - 安静

I felt, that night, incredibly close to everything in the universe, but also extremely alone.
I wondered for the first time in my life, if life was worth all the work it took to live.
What exactly made it worth it?
What's so horrible about being dead forever, and not feeling anything, and not even dreaming?
What's so great about feeling and dreaming?

安静

I'm reminded of you again. My wmp loves to play this song when i put on shuffle. I think she understands me.

I rmb when I first hear you cry. We were talking, you've met ur competitor. You were listening to Jay's new album and you loved it. This was your favourite song, or the song that touches your heart as it says what you feel. You emphasised on the last four words. You wanted to do what the song says, u felt that i was drifting. I'm not.



Your appearance hurt me once again.

The first time you 'stabbed' me was when you admit about her existence through the phone.
The second time was when you turned and left outside the HOD room, leaving me to tear for all to see.
The third is when you reappear with another girl and ask to be friends again.

I can't let go. I forgave you, but some things should be left untouched. You do not know the seriousness of you. I couldn't see the impact of you. I thought the tears washed it away.

I need to get a life. I cannot go on like this. I need a break. If only I have the courage to leave this place, then i'll fly to somewhere far, somewhere where I won't be looked down on, somewhere where everybody is like me, they all like me, noone despise anyone. I need a place where all those who were hurted will gather and share all their woes.
But I don't have the courage. I don't have the strength. I don't have a destination.

Tomorrow...

I'll be off to study in a chalet... Yeap.. alittle crazy but its an offer i cannot miss. Zw's got a voucher for a room accomodating 4 guest at $42, which means $10.50 for each guest, but it expires this month.

Since zw shan and i are preparing for our exams, and we meet out often to study, why not do it in a chalet where we dont have a limit and we are not in a homely environment.. i'm not sure if laine is having her exams also, but no harm inflicting our study mood into her..

Well, I dont feel so good about this chalet.. I can't help but think that we are just going to play.. thankfully zw and laine is coming along.. only with the presence of the both of them then will shan and i concentrate fully..

I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

I left out something in the previous entry.

Just to let you know that on National Day, 9th August 2006, I'm an auntie again.

Except that this time, the relationship between this nephew and I is rather complicated. So, how should I start....

Ok. Many Many years ago, before my ah ma left indonesia for singapore, she gave one of her daughters to her sister for her to adopt. So now, I have an auntie who has 2 mothers - 1 adopted mom(grandaunt) and 1 birth mom(my ah ma). My ah ma came to singapore and left my aunt and grandaunt in indonesia. My aunt no longer calls my ah ma 'mother' anymore.

Many years later, my grandaunt passed away. My aunt comes back to reconcile with my ah ma, but my aunt's documents still states that my grandaunt is her mother. Officially, my ah ma is her aunt.

Confusing? Take some time to digest.. that is if u're interested...

So now, this nephew is this aunt's grandson. Which makes him a close relative by blood, by not by heart.
Well, some may say that even if he was a distant relative, he'll still be blood related.. which is not in this case. Another complicated story...

My ah ma and my grandaunt have different mothers. My ah ma was my greatgrandfather's 1st child. My greatgrandmother died when my ah ma was 4 or 5 years old. My greatgrandfather remarried and had a few more daughters. This grandaunt was one of them. So my ah ma was raised by a stepmother and raised a bunch of stepsisters for the rest of her life.

I wouldn't have known so much if I didn't spend time with my ah ma. Her life is really very complicated and she still hasnt' finished her story. From what I know, this family has alot of secrets hidden from my generation(3rd generation). The 2nd generation knows things that we are not suppose to know, but my ah ma slipped her tongue when we chat. These secrets are deadly and can hurt someone's heart if leaked out.
Shite. If only my ah ma didn't tell me.. but I guess she forgot that she told me... I'll just pretend I know nothing...

Having a Headache.

Last night my matriachal side of the family gathered for my ah ma's birthday. My uncle chose a teochew restaurant at Centerpoint, thinking that my ah ma will love the food there.

Then, it so happens that there's an old man celebrating his 70th birthday too. He reserved almost the whole restaurant. Well, thats not the point. The point is, that (big) family invited the lion dance people to dance for the occasion. I was really interested at first, but until I realise how loud it was. It's kinda embarrassing to be having a lion dance troupe in a shopping centre in town! And the thing is, this lion dance troupe danced for an Hour! From 8pm to 9pm! The restaurant isn't exactly very big, and it's not very empty. In fact, its totally packed with tables. There're not enought walking space in between chairs too.

Imagine this. The lion dance troupe and the drummers, percusionists, all in the centre of the restaurant. All of us within four walls, and the ceiling is not very high. Imagine the noise travelling in the confined space. It was as loud as standing beside the troupe.

I couldn't eat well last night.

Oh! One more thing! I saw my little niece last night too! She's so adorable. Totally stole the limelight from my ah ma, but she's not complaining. She's my ah ma's 1st great grandchild. If I'm not mistaken, she should be about 6months old. Really cute!!! wait till i get the photos of her that night, then i'll show it to u how pretty that little thing is. Little Jazreel, tat's her name, but she doesn't seem to react to her eng name as much as her chinese name. As usual, this habit runs in the family. So, she only looks at me when I call her yanyan - which is still not her full name. She doesnt turn her head when I call Kaiyan - which is her name. Teaching the baby wrong things.
I am thinking.. she's like a puppy now.. she only reacts to the name she thinks is her name - yanyan. When her real name is really not yanyan. It shows that she's not trained properly.

So then, Lesson #1. When u have a newborn, call her/him by her real name. Do not give her/him petnames to confuse her/him.

News Flash #

My lovely Samsoon is coming to chU!! To all the fattys out there! Watch it to boost your self-confidence.

Warning! Side effects may occur.

Side effects:

• Thinking that it's okay to overeat.
• Forgets that reality still applies.
• You'll want to fall in love even more after being single for decades.
• Your favourite food now are cakes, and kimchi.
• Daydreaming and talking to yourself. (inflicted by the Samsoon character.)
• etc...

On to further news...

Went for the ITP briefing. Glad to know that at least something is right for my internship. My liaison officer (L.O.) is very nice. In fact, too nice, very much like a mother hen. She spoonfeed us alot, which is a good thing. She worries too much, which gets alittle stressful for me. She prepares more than enough for all of us, which is what I would love to have.

How does she do all that you may ask. Well, she printed all the required form for us, and printed extra copies just in case. She wants our telephone no. written onto her list even though the no. is printed on the list already. She keeps repeating herself just in case we didn't get her or she missed out something. She keeps reassuring us of all our queries. She's even got the abscence form printed in bulk and handed us 4 copies, just in case. She insists that we take down everything she says. She ensures that we are comfortable with our assigned companies and double confirm that we are happy.

Too motherly. I'm not complaining, finally something good. Hope this goes on.

安静

只剩下钢琴陪我谈了一天，
睡着的大提琴，安静的，久久的。
我想你一表现得非常明白，
我懂我也知道， 你没有舍不得。

你说你也会难过，我不相信。

牵着你陪着我，也只是乘经。

希望他是真的比我还要爱你。

我已经逼自己离开。

你要我说个难堪，我根本不想分开。
为什么要我用微笑来带过。 （我没有。）
我没有这种天分，包容你也接受她。
不用担心的太多，我回一直好好过。

你已经远远离开，我已经慢慢走开。
为什么我连分开都迁就着你。

我真的没有天分，安静的没这么快，
我会学者放弃你，是因为我太爱你。

你还记得吗？我刚发现这首歌的真正意义。原来，到头来，这首歌是属于我的。也许这就是命运，也许这是注定的。当我们听到这首歌时，当你爱上这首歌时，结局就已经订好了。你搞错了，里面描述的受害者不是你，而是我。

这就是我们的结局。这是我们的句号。

原来如此。

I've never felt so embarassed.

I do not believe in movie critics anymore.

Watched 'Click'. The more I watch his show, the more I love Adam Sandler. He's really good.
Anyways, as usual, don't believe the critics. This is a cross between comedy and tragic story. At the start, things go wrong, nothing is right. And then, Adam Sandler tries to find a remedy. Things go smoothly, better than expectations. But no good things come for free. Things get messed up and nothing can turn back what's lost. Thankfully he's given a 2nd chance.

But do I have a 2nd chance? Apparently not.

Watched Miao Shou Ren Xin III (Healing Hands III) on cable ch55. There's this doc who opened a clinic and fell sick. He refuse to face his illness. Strongheaded, stubborn and refuse to admit defeat. But all things come to an end one day and everyone forgives him. He's given a 2nd chance at the hospital.

But do I have a 2nd chance? I don't think so.

I see where I've gone wrong. Too stubborn for my own good. I'll learn to change, I promise. But I don't want a 2nd chance anymore, not that I'm given any.

My mom never gave me any 2nd chances. She still doesnt trust me. I've learnt to be good but she still doesn't believe me. No matter what I do, what I say, she still doesnt see my point. I've learnt my mistakes (as a daughter), she hasn't (as a mother).

I love my family. but i hate my mother. she's too stubborn. I don't wanna be like her.

2nd chance? Not given any, at all.

I live in the past

Everyone else is approaching the future.

Maybe that's why I can't let go. As the future I fear most approaches me, the more I dwell into history. Forgive me.

I can't erase my past like what you did, because I prefer my past to my present. It is childish to think that what's done can be undone. It's even more childish to try to undo it. All I can do is to mend it. Do you hear me?

Mesmerised

He really has a way with words. Everytime I speak to him, I get sucked into another dimension, his dimension. He has a way of making me feel wanted. I blush everytime he speaks, even though I can't see him. It is like he acknowledges my existence and wants to make me feel cherished. I like this feeling. But I know that he speaks to every other gal in the same tone, which makes me sad. I do know of one gal he speaks differently to. One gal he has to hear her voice every night before he sleeps, this gal is the one he thinks of every morning when he wakes up, the one who he sms every moment. At least I can't be sure of what he dreams of, because u nv know what he is thinking. He is one casanova I'll never be able to see through.

I was wrong

The boss wasn't late. It was my fault. I was using a cranky phone that decides to crank up at the wrong time.

Well, I wasn't able to receive or make any phone calls as my phone went mad. I didn't realise until very much later... Luckily the director waited patiently.. otherwise I would have gotten into a serious trouble.


Watched the Lake House.. The movie critics sux big time!!!! LakeHouse is a wonderful movie!! Besides the actor who is rather stiff, the script was brilliant! Right from the start, the audience were pulled into the story, engaging everyone's mind.

The ending was the unexpectable. Although halfway through u wld have probably guessed half of the ending, but the ultimate ending was to die for. Did she make it to the mailbox in time? Did he get the mail in time? We were all curious.

It's like a grown up fairytale with a twist, so obviously the feline species will enjoy it more. Definitely not a chickflick as no chicks are involved. I would say its not a mushy love story as not much physical interaction was involved either. But the touching content will be quite disappointing, in my point of view. Evidence: I didn't go all emo on this one, there were no tears.

Guys out there, bring ur gals to this movie. She'll love it, I'll vouch fortat.

Does this mean I can be late for work too?

The man is late. Very late. It’s 2.29pm now and he is not here yet. I don’t know how are we going to meet when neither of us know how each other looks like. All he knows is my name and my no. and I address him by Mr. Ng. I don’t even know if he owns a handphone. Maybe he is a stingy person, that explains why he nv uses his hp to call me. Or his hp is only for personal use.. then that company must be freaking small.

But I wont be surprised if he is stingy or thrifty.. My mom told me that this company must be a really small one and the bosses’ action shows it. He is willing to come down to NP just to interview me shows that the company do not need an extra burden. He really needs a person who is worth the money.

Shite… pressure.
Continue waiting? Maybe I shall call 1st…
I will update on the interview.. Hope nothing goes wrong…

I wish for a slacker job in my internship company.

I am the unlucky one. It’s always me. It stinks.

Why do I say so?

My ITP (internship) for this holiday is screwed up.
Firstly, I never receive any notification about my internship. Everyone else has news except for me. I panicked.

Out of nowhere on a Friday evening, the director of a company called to ask for my resume. I have no clue as to what was going on so I took down his particulars and promised to reply him on Monday as soon as I’ve checked with my school. I sent my resume anyway, thinking that there’s not harm to it.

I went to the BA office and as usual, they have no access to anything. They always have no access to anything. The woman in the office took my number, student no. and told me to wait for her reply. In the evening, once again, I got her call and she said that the letter of notification has been sent and that I have 2 choices: 1. Wait patiently for the letter to arrive. 2. Go to Blk 16 to retrieve my letter manually. Pissed.

The next day, I talked to KPT about it. She couldn’t help me either. The director of the company called again. This time, he requested for an interview. INTERVIEW!!! WTH!!

So I went to look for Mr. Ong, the lecturer in charge of ITP. He dutifully printed my letter and advised me on the interview. I was told to proceed and do as the director requests. Grrr…

The director arranged to meet in NP canteen 1 for the interview at 2pm today. It’s approximately 12.30pm now, my class ended at 10.30am. I’m waiting alone, writing this, watching the lunch crowd for today. I’m so nervous. He wants to see my work on dreamweaver because I wrote in my resume that I know some basics on macromedia. Hope he doesn’t like my work.. then I wont have extra workload during my 8weeks of internship.

Now I hope that after going through all these trouble, I really want to spend my internship life peacefully and smoothly. No more problems arising, be it a mistake or deliberately (by the boss).