My Punk Rock Days Are Back

I mentioned that I was watching Gossip Girls, and the ending of Episode 7 left a deep impression.
No, not because Chuck and Blair had sex in the back of a limo.
I was more interested in the song playing in the background.

I sent an SOS email to my brothers, hoping they can curb my urge for this song.
My fat brother didn't even read the email, but my lawyer brother was kind enough to reply me with a, "I don't know la. It's punk rock leh." email.

Grrr!
Unhelpful.

Nevermind, I can only depend on myself then.
Googled and wasted my dl quota just for my cravings.

*Types Simple Plan*
-songs are too familiar to be the one-

*Types My Chemical Romance*
-wrong voice-

*Types Good Charlotte*
-nearly there-

*Types Sum 41*
-B-I-N-G-O-


I have no idea what took me so long to find a Sum41 song.
I should have known.

It's on loop right now, replacing *ahem* my darlings' new single.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Apologies to a Friend
I wanna tell you that I love you so much and I really did think of you every second when I made that decision, but because it was already the last few days, they ran out of sizes. It was half price of half price but there was really no more S or XS.
So I got 1 for myself.



I'm sososososorry.
Only Big Bang Fans Understand.

Channing Tatum

Weird name, Hot Bod.

I didn't know, did you?
Channing Tatum, the Step Up Hottie, is actually the Hot Soccer dude in Amanda Byne's "She's The Man"!

When I rewatched "She's The Man" like minutes ago, I was like,
"Wow! That guy is freaking Hot and Familiar."

Digged my brain and checked out Step Up, he's the one!

Somehow, in Step Up 2, his few minutes appearance caught my attention the 2nd time I watched it.
He gave me the Edison Chen vibes.
I think it's the smile.

Nono.. I'm not over with Yunho, never.

But some would know why I'm always so into the Edison vibe.... i think...
or maybe it's the S*** vibe.

Anyways, go check out those movies again... He's better than salsa sauce!

Classics

I gave up on Disney's drama mama stories and tried some classics.
I never realised how melodramatic Beauty and the Beast was until I rewatched it this time.Belle thinks she's in the 90s.
Oh, maybe she really was.

First on the list, Edward Scissorhands.
One of my brother's favourite classics.

I still remember how my brother could watch this movie over and over and never get sick of it. I never understood the story line of the movie, but the scissorhands was entertaining when u're an ignorant child.
Still, I always teared when he ran back to the castle and lived his life in solitude once again.

So I've decided to find out finally what was the story about, which got me tearing again, this time, I know why my tears came rolling down.

It's a beautiful movie, and I think film makers now lack that imagination nowadays.

Back then, when we played this movie on loop, I always thought Edward was creepy, especially at the start, when he first appeared on screen. It felt more like a horror story than something beautiful.

As I got older, Johnny Depp got famously hot, but I never knew Edward was Johnny. Until one day, after the Pirates Craze, my brother broke the mystery of Edward's real name.
Then, Johnny wasn't so hot anymore.
But he's the most convincing actor in the world.

And when people say Pirates could be Johnny's hottest work ever, I hafta disagree.
Edward is the best representative of Johnny.

Then again, I'm not a big Johnny Depp fan, and I haven't watched that many Johnny Depp movies.
So who am I to say anything.

Maybe I'm just overwhelmed by the movie.
Off to dreadful dinner!

Zw needs it more than I do

I'm waiting for my download on DC to be done.

Getting a list of Disney movies that Zhiwei might need...

Beauty and the Beast,
Cinderella,
Sleeping Beauty,
Alice in Wonderland,
Little Mermaid,
Etc...

Disney, which means they are not China-twisted stories.
And it only takes 5mins for the download, since I'm not really downloading it, just transferring them from the server to my com...

But I'm just enlightened.
The Perfect Idea.
*Big Smiles*

You don't mind right?

First things first.
My blog HARDLY has any photos/pictures that DON'T revolve around TVXQ.
So I'm not accustomed to uploading anything besides TVXQ.
Therefore, updates of Na's Life In Brisbane will mostly come in text.
Live with it.

Next, life has gotten a little more entertaining since a senior got us (me & 2 other new Sg girls who're now my buddies) an amazing program.

It's called DC.
Apparently, I suspect, designed by a college geek, this program allows LAN connection to everyone in the college who has this program.
It works like Ares.
You can download movies, music, TV show, softwares, anything that can be shared through this program.
The best part is, it doesn't eat up any download quota at all!
Think of it like we're sharing/transfering files through a network.
A combination of IRC and Ares.

So, the first thing I did was to get myself Gossip Girl (which someone owed me since forever), Family Guy all Seasons, and a couple of movies.

Which brings me to the main point of this post.
I was "blown" away by the bitching and slutting scripted in Gossip Girl.

Gossip Girl Reality Check
The actors don't even look like 18 year olds!
18 year olds look like my neighbours.
But they do act like 18 year olds, like my neighbours.

And then while blog surfing, I found the MOST dramatic entry ever posted!
This person probably never watched Gossip Girl, but WaWa (a random name I gave to this person) practically reenacted the story of Gossip Girl.

Or maybe WaWa thinks he/she is one of the actors in the show, bitching and slutting in his/her blog.

This is so Gay.

Hmm... maybe my honorable friend might know who I'm talking about.
And if you do know who u are, tell me if I'm too obvious.

I know I can't get killed if WaWa finds out, because it'll cost ALOT of money to get here and WaWa probably don't have that money.
But I'll very much prefer to not let anything happen.

How exciting do you expect Brisbane to be?

The only exciting part of Na's life in Brisbane:

RECORD-BREAKING NEWS!!!

3 CONSECUTIVE NO.1 ON JAPAN'S WEEKLY ORICON CHARTS!!!!!!!

TVXQ's DOUSHITE SINGLE IS THE ULTIMATE MUST-HAVE THIS SEASON!!!
FIRST FOREIGN ARTISTE TO EVER DO THAT!!
THE LAST 2 consecutive no. 1 on Japan's Weekly Oricon Charts Record WAS BROKEN BEFORE I WAS BORN!!!!!

WOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The rest of Na's life:

It's only 3 days.... Brisbane's excitement can only fill up that many post u-know?
(pun intended)

Let's see... Brisbane is pretty boring actually.
It's the things that i do that makes it colourful, and it wasn't even intentional.

I've got Mon and Tues off every week, so basically, school officially starts on Wednesday for me, which is Today.

1st lecture in UQ was scheduled at 8am.
I didn't have a choice, it was the only slot given to us, and I totally don't function so early in the morning.

I dragged myself out of bed at 7.20am, took a shower, packed my bag and skipped breakfast.
Realised I was late, and rushed to the location almost looking like I had the "Not In Operation" sign hanging around my neck.

In the block that i was suppose to go to, there was more than 1 lecture hall, so I guess you guys can pretty much figure out what I did.
(We all took comprehension in school, for crying out loud!)

It's the first lesson in Australia, 1st class in UQ and the 1st for me to embarrass myself so badly while interupting an entire lecture.
My ass almost wanted to sit through a Biomedical class.

So then, it was market day today.

Basically, on market day, there'd be stalls set up around the Great Court (Huge Grass Field in the middle of the sandstone buildings) selling sg fleamarket kinda stuff, and stalls set up by sports, society and clubs.

Since it was drizzling all day today, and the weather decided to throw a tantrum and drop the degrees by a few notches, the event was shifted indoors into 3 different locations.

As a marketing student, I really wanna advise these Australians to always come up with a contingency plan and NEVER split an event into so many locations, cuz then, you'd be splitting up the crowd and losing the commotion and atmosphere.

I'm an undergraduate and I can think of that, I have no idea why can't they.
(Wows! I just realised that I'm an undergraduate. Something different when I'm filling up forms...)

There's this new international students dinner organised by my college and my college buddies and I were invited.
We were not keen on participating and while we were telling the office lady to strike our names off the list, out of curiousity, I made a stupid remark, which got us into a no return trip to hell.

"I was just wondering, how do we have to dress up for the dinner? Because we didn't bring any pretty clothes to wear."

It was a lie, but the words came out before it could reach my brain (okay, doesn't make sense.)

The lady sent us to the Head Of College, who gave advice on what to wear and where to get them, and without asking, added our names to the guest list for the dinner.

Concisely, on Na's first day of school, I've made more mistakes than I'd have in a month.
I blame it on waking up and forcing my frozen rusty brain to work at 8am in the morning.

Na also fried her shrunken clothes in the dryer.
Stir-fried Denim with Detergent Seasoned Socks, anyone?

--------------------------------------------Edit-------------------------------------------

"They have SBS in Australia TV!?"

"SBS as in Special Broadcasting Service, not Seoul Broadcasting System lar!"

*Deflates*

Yunho is Shy!! Gah!!!

Again, I couldn't resist. This time, I had another friend to share the download quota, so it's slightly less expensive.


Oh lord! Yunho blushes in front of his idol!
But too bad it's all an act, because the TVXQ scenes and JeonJiHyun scenes were done separately and CGI-ed together.
Otherwise it'll probably be impossible for Yunho to film anything at all!!

I love Yunho's FanBoy expressions!!!
(it kinda makes him feel more real than ever)

I bet if Changmin's one was HanGaIn, he'll be as crazy as I am right now!!!
I'm kinda hoping that the both of them will be able to work tgt one day, so i can see Changmin's Fanboy reactions... Wahahahahaha!!!

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The Random Part

Weekend lunch = Dreadful.

No. of Nivea products in my room = 6.
What has 3rd year in Poly done to me?

Off to dreadful-ness now.
See you.

I need to buy 4D!

I kena bird shit.

seriously.

I was by the lake with Janice, trying to take photos of the B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L scenery of the campus (Yes, not 1 lake but 3 lakes in the school that is by the river.) And while viewing the pictures taken, a bird decides to have a go on top of me.
I never knew why my dad is always so paranoid about standing under trees, but now I do.

It landed on my sleeves.

Grossed Out!!

So on our way back, we were discussing whether if this was a lucky or unlucky thing to happen.

And I concluded that it's my unlucky day.

So when I got home, turned on my computer and started my routine of surfing CNA for my only way to get connected to the world, an msn alert got me in shock!

Shan probably knew about this quite a while ago, but I only just found out today that there's actually a TVXQ boy fan whom I'm friends with!!!!!!!!

I'm still in shock.

He was exclaiming how handsome his DP is and I was like, mine's hotter.

Whatever.
Yours is Pretty. Mine is HOT. period.

He probably doesn't read my blog, but I'm still in shock and I need somewhere to release my excitement.

So now, I conclude that today indeed is a Lucky day for me.

Maybe people reading this can try to buy 4D with a set of numbers I'll give out for free on this blog, just because I'm happily in shock right now.

Na's Lucky 4D No. : 6286

How I arrived at these numbers?
wahahahaha!
6th February 1986.
Go Figure.
(If u're not a TVXQ fan, don't bother.)

I've not recovered from the shock.
Excuse me.
My first Dong Bang guy friend.
I'm gasping.

Thank me if the numbers really comes out for 4D.

--------------------------------------Edit-------------------------------------------

Oh! and thankfully I didn't get the Haptic phone (that TVXQ did a CF with SNSD) because there's a NEW HAPTIC THAT ONLY HAS TVXQ ENDORSING!!!!!!!!!!!

but Yunho doesn't use Haptic:
(Credit as tagged)
Photo taken when they recently returned to Kimpo Airport.
Jaejoong doesn't even use Samsung.

So maybe I should consider iPhone 3G.
It's out in Aus btw, hahas... heard it's only gonna be released in Sg end of the year... Poor things.

Arch Nemesis

I thought leaving a tropical country like Singapore would mean I'm free of house lizards, but I was wrong.

1+ weeks of staying in Brisbane, I assumed that house lizards don't manifest Brisbane at all, but tonight, I was proven that maybe because it's the winter, so they've been hibernating, and since the weather has been getting warmer, the lizards are coming out to feed/play/scare me.While having a very confusing conversation with my parents on msn, I found a lizard on the other side of the caravan window, right beside me.

About this confusing conversation, my mom is having problems with the msn in her computer.
So I tried asking her questions so that I can try and help to find the problem, but she's too busy asking her own questions and complaining about her problems to bother about me.
So much for complaining about us, ignoring her questionS in her sms-es.

So she keeps signing out, and when she signs back in again, she'd open up another mass conversation window.

And my dad's who's as good as a computer illiterate, would stick to the old window, having no idea that my mom has started a whole new conversation.

So my mom is busy finding out her problems, totally ignoring my help, and my dad got curious after finding out that there's actually another conversation going on in his computer.

"Mummy. Answer my question. Did you download EXACTLY what you downloaded for papa in his computer?"

"Papa, do you see a blinking button on the bottom of your screen?"

And it took them 5 mins and 3 repeats to answer these 2 questions. But it doesn't matter cuz they'll be back to their frenzy again straight away.

Parents.
They're too used to Talk and Obey.
They should really Stop and Listen sometimes.

I raised my white flag and pushed them to my fat brother.
We shall settle later in the Vcall where conversations flow more smoothly.

-----------------------------------Edit 9:38pm (GMT +10)----------------------------------
IT'S A BIG DEAL!!!

I have to blog this immediately!!!

I'm not sure if you can see this properly, but Yunho's using the SAME laptop as MINE!!!

This was during their T Tour Photoshoot.

OMG!!! I was screaming out loud in my room!!!!!

Like finally there's life in my body after so many days of dead silence!!!!!!

THE SAME LAPTOP!!!
It's probably not his laptop, but WHAT IF IT IS????
of maybe WHAT IF IT BELONGED TO ANOTHER MEMBER???
OMG!!!!!!!!

YUNHO YAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm so proud of myself.

1st it was the converse sneakers and Junsu, my No.2.
Now it's My Laptop and Yunho, My Number One.

I can laugh in my sleep and even laugh myself awake tonight.

Wahahahaha!!!

Credit: breakupshell & westkitsune

I do miss home

At the start, I thought I didn't miss home, but more of the comfort I have at home.
But this morning, woke up feeling enlightened.

It all began in the perfect sunny weather today of 23 Degrees.
I was under the quilt, enjoying the last few minutes of sleep, preparing to wake up.

Before lifting up my eyelids, I was expecting my Mat Jambol room, with the high pointed ceiling and the morning afternoon sun greeting me through the full length window at the foot of the bed.

Upon opening my eyes, I saw a totally different room. The old yellowish curtains, caravan style windows and a squeaky metal bed frame.

Suddenly I felt disappointment flooding my Heart, Mind and Soul (Wahahahaha!! Inside joke for all TVXQ fans).

It kinda hurts when reality strikes without knocking. The worst part was, I was totally looking forward to rise from my bed and greet my TVXQ posters. Urgh!

I'm contemplating on printing some TVXQ pictures and sticking them up my walls so it looks more like home. But then again, I've to ration my cartridge cuz I won't know how much ink i'll need in the coming months.

On the bright side, I'm leading a life that many dream of having. Studying abroad without financial woes is a blessing I'm grateful for and I only have my parents to thank for that.

Last night, my mom promised full sponsorship of internet connectivity (just because she feels comforted seeing my face through video calls) and my dad promised full sponsorship of gourmet food whenever I feel like eating out, avoiding the sometimes horrible meals they serve in the college.

But I just wanna let all of you know, I know my limits.
Splurging is no longer a luxury I can (should) afford.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I feel like I'm on a one way traffic because I'm the only one doing the talking and no one is responding.
Everyone is interested and finding out about my life in Brisbane but I have no idea what's everyone up to (except for a handful of Sweethearts).

No Addresses,
No Updates,
No News,
This Won't Do!

So much for reminding me to update my blog when no one is making the effort to keep in touch.
I'm starting to feel like it's all a facade again, like stage lines that you all just blurt out because it's necessary to (and cuz that's what you always hear on TV).

I've just added more people to my unappreciative list of friends. I'm starting to get so childish, I know.

Instructions to get yourself out of the list:
Step 1: Sign in to your email account.
Step 2: Type hoshigal@hotmail.com or sheena.ng@gmail.com into the "To:" blank.
Step 3: Type your Home Address, including your Postal Code into the message space.
Step 4: Click "Send".
Step 5: Wait for 1 working day and you'll find you name out of the list automatically.

Blog Tour

I'm supposed to not reveal any pictures until I get all my addresses, but my relatives and family has been complaining.
They're allowed to.
Oh wells.

HQ pictures are reserved for family and close friends (who responded) only.
This is what you get for taking your time sending the addresses!

(Click the photos for a larger view)

And then, we have the school:

Now we're leaving school and into the city:

Some Highly Desirable Australian Indulgence:

I realise that in Brisbane, I can take photos without any skill, talent or photoshop and the photos will still come out looking decent.

That's All Folks!

Urgh!!

I couldn't resist! I went to watch TVXQ's Doushite PV which took up 12mb!!
It wasn't even HQ!!

I'll need 100mb to watch We Got Married HyunJoong/HwangBo cuts!!!
I can't afford that!!

This is where my 12mb went:

It was worth it though.
I'm playing the song on loop now on my wmp.

I need more TVXQ!!!!!!
That video is tempting me for more YTs but it's gonna eat up my limit and before you know it, i'm on my next 1gb card.

Furthermore, my trip to the city today was pretty expensive...
Let me see...
Cotton On,
Supre,
City Beach,
Jay Jay, and
Krispy Kreme.
Total Spent: A$75 = ard S$100 (in 1.32 exchange rate).

I kinda went overboard and undisciplined because I was drowned in all the Big Red Sale and Discount Signboards all around Queen Street.

Oh yea, it's mid-year sale season in Brisbane right now, so things are gg at A$10/15/25/30 in almost all of the shops. You can even find good A$5 stuff if you're lucky.

Spree anyone?
I charge A$5 per order for handling fees.
Shipping at your own cost.
Wahahaha!

Pictures only when I get my addresses!
Yes, this is a threat! I'm not kidding.
So send them right now!

Everyone Dead?

C'mon! I've only got 3 address replies since my last post!

Fine, I'll get the ball rolling.

Na's address:

Attn: Sheena Ng
Union College
38 Upland Road
St. Lucia Q4067

So there, now you got mine, I need yours.
I'll only get photos of the Beautiful Brisbane up only when I get at least 5 more addresses!

Until then, you'll only see letters. >.<

My dear friend finally decides to blog again, and I see her typing like so many other non-korean k-pop fans with the korean text for laughing and emotexts like T.T and etc.

Speaking of K-pop fan, bad news for all the Anti-Sheena-Loves-TVXQ mates out there, cuz Na found an Extreme K-pop Lover Singaporean who's moving into my college during O-week. (She wants to stay with her mom for now, so she's like in a hotel now.)
She goes to Soompi, Youtube, and download Kpop videos just like Me!!
Except that her fandom is not restricted to TVXQ only, but all of K-pop.

I'm a Mega TVXQ fan, which ultimately leads to me become a part of Kpop and a little Jpop fan as well, so we Click!

Wahahahaha!!!

She's passing me some chi subbed (gosh! this wld be the way to maintain my mandarin standards) SS501 videos and whatever else she has.

SHE HATES SOSHI TOO!!!
rofl!!

2 days and I've used 100mb w/o videos, just RSS Feeds of my TVXQ (& Kpop) updates. Some used on my Singapore Sweethearts' blogs and msn v-call home and on www.cna for my only way to keep myself connected to Sg and Asia.

That's quite an accomplishment!
Therefore, I'm gonna reward myself by sparing 50mb tonight or tmr for Youtubing.
*Big Smiles*
I can't wait!

Not forgetting that I'm NOT gonna miss out on DL-ing TVXQ's coming soon single next week, which I'll make a 10mb allowance, just in case.
I've been anticipating it for soooo long!
I can't miss it, never!

It's 10mins to 12nn here in Brisbane, although I know it says I blogged this 2hrs earlier, that because I didn't adjust the time in my blogger.
I'm heading down to the City and grab myself a few Krispy Kremes for the weekend.
Wahahaha!
I see jealous souls!

Until then!
Addresses People!!!!

Internet Checked

Like finally! I'm connected.
and some1 finally came to fix the cranky heater, which is only 1.5 times warmer than b4.
Australians *Sigh*

Anyways, just wanna ask all my Singapore Sweethearts to email me your home address (with postal code please) asap!

If you've no idea if you fall under my Singapore Sweethearts category, those who sent me off at the airport (inclusive of those who only send me off with an SMS or msgs) are qualified.

The others like my Dong Bang Friends, TB12 smarties and Queensway oldies (who knows that I'm in Brisbane) are also included.

Hurry and email me your address like RIGHT NOW!
Please don't wait for me to send an invitation to you personally cuz it really eats up my download limit.

Thanks in advance!!

Offline Updates

The following entries were written before I’ve got my internet connection in my college:

G’day Mate!

8^th July, 2008

It’s my 8^th day in Brisbane and I still don’t have internet. I’m writing this in Words so I can copy them later when I finally get connected. It’s like a delayed-publicized diary.

I’m still trying to figure out the weather pattern here in Brisbane, cuz it can rain heavily today, sunny drizzle tmr, and rain again the next day. And it really freezes when it rains!

Oh, and so much for going early to rent a place near school, cuz on the 3^rd day in Brisbane, Union College (an on-campus “hostel”) emailed to say that they have a vacant room, but I’ll need to pay more because it comes with an attached toilet and a living hall. *Big Smiles* Perfect.

(Frankly speaking, with my “toilet-comfort-recognition-system” embedded in my ass since I was little, I was once worried about getting constipated if I were to use common toilets.)

So now I’m living like a privileged kid in the college, with my ang-moh girl neighbor (whom I’ve only met twice) gasping at the size of my “room”.

But there are cons that come along because the common toilet is where your neighbours interact and get to know each other, which I’ll miss out and thus, after so many days in the college, I haven’t found any friends to hang out with. They’re all just acquaintance who I’ll meet during meals.

My mom was like, “Haiya! Then you just go idle around the common toilet more often lar!”

Like WTH!? That’ll make me look desperate! And I’m surviving just nice with the laptop and radio in my room. It just gets alittle lonely and awkward when it comes to meal times,but that’s it, it’s really no big deal since I’m kinda enjoying the solitude. :D

When I was on the plane to Brisbane, it suddenly struck me that the reason why I have less (nearly no) excitement about studying in Brisbane is because, the idea of schooling overseas is kinda glued into my head since the day I’ve set my mind to apply for an overseas uni. The fact that I’ve been holidaying every year with my family has kinda numbed my anticipation for travelling, especially when this is my 3^rd time in Australia.

I think I’d be a lot more excited if I’m going to places like Europe, US or… hahas… S.Korea (or maybe Japan; depending on where my lovelies are). =D

Speaking of my lovelies, since the day I arrived, I’ve not been updated with their news AT ALL. Other than sab’s sms about Super Junior performing on MTVasia Awards, which I’ll miss (like a lot of other things), no Kpop news at all. I’m hanging onto my TVXQ with the few videos and performances I’ve saved in my laptop.

Oh, I don’t think anyone knows this yet, but to those who strongly disagrees with my TVXQ craziness, you’re in luck, because from now on, Na has a download limit of 200mb per month. This means, no youtube, no soompi, no veoh, no Kpop downloads. Because I need this 200mb for school doc and I’ll have to use whatever I’ve left to keep in touch with my Singapore Sweethearts.

Of course, the school/college is not that cruel as to tie us down with the meager download limit, but if I do want more downloads, I’ll have to pay A$10 for each extra 1gb.

Grrr!

I’ve spent so much this week on stuff for my room, I’ll need to thrift for the rest of the month and maybe next month too. This extra expense will have to wait, and thus my Kpop and TVXQ darlings as well.

I finally realize how fortunate Singaporeans are, with unlimited broadband, wireless at such a reasonable price.

So stop complaining about how expensive your internet bills are because with the amount you download a month, you’ll be spending 10times more here in Brisbane.

Therefore, how can I get excited when I’m separated from my Lovelies, Darlings and Sweethearts? This is more like a grueling challenge I must face in order to grow up and return with confidence. This is my chance to make my parents feel proud of their daughter.

Okays, enough words, but unfortunately the pictures won’t come in so soon because I’m still testing out how long 200mb can last, which means I’d be surfing the net very conservatively. You all will have to wait a little more for the gigantic beautiful campus of University of Queensland.

(It’s really like what you see on TV. The ang-mohs sitting on a grass field, reading and eating kind of environment.)

Enjoy your Sunny Scorching lives in Singapore! (=

I Miss Yunho

9^th July, 2008

Still no connection.

Argh! Super Suay (as in unlucky)!!!!

Before coming to Brisbane, I kinda knew that there’s a high possibility that I’m gonna have restricted internet access, thus I downloaded a few stuff to stock up.

I was so busy before departure, so I didn’t check the files and when I finally decided to watch the videos, I found 1 out of sync, and another TVXQ Malaysian Concert Video totally unenjoyable because that’s the concert where Yunho hurt his back and couldn’t dance as much. *Pulls Hair*

I am so deprived of Yunho right now, and I don’t really feel like watching the old videos, because you have no idea how many times I’ve rewatched them.

I NEED NEW VIDEOS!! But I can’t… )=

Erm… yea, since school hasn’t started and my floor (as in the level I’m living on) is pretty vacant, I don’t have much to do (except for cleaning up and tidying my room, which I’m too lazy to), which is why I’m writing these delayed-publicized diaries to kill time.

But like my mom says, “It’s only for these 2weeks, because when school starts, I’d be expecting you to be studying and revising every night.”

Hmm… yea sure. I’m not sure if that’s really gonna happen because in 20years of my life, that has never occurred a single time at all. I mean, I don’t even do it when she’s around, so what makes her think that it would be different when I’m in Brisbane without her supervision? This is absurd. But if it really happens, look up the sky for shooting stars, cuz you’ll know that a miracle is about to appear.

Okays, back to (old) video watching again. Janice (as in Zeewee’s friend, not the TB12 Janice ß I need to make that clear bcuz the 2 Janices are worlds apart) just arrived yesterday, so I gave her time to settle down in her apartment. We’re gonna meet up later and catch up on everything. She’s gonna tell me all the big news in Singapore, and I’m gonna guide her on how to lead an amateur life in Brisbane.

I miss Singapore’s 30 degree Celsius. I really do.

I just wanna stay indoors

9^th July 2008

My 2^nd entry for the day, and I’m here because it’s just too cold to go outdoors. I brought Janice and Jammie into the campus, made their student IDs and visited the BEL (BizEconsLaw) Faculty. By then, my hands were frozen numb and I couldn’t wait to get back into my room and sit beside the heater.

I actually planned to do the laundry this evening, but it was just waaay too cold to just walk down a few flight of stairs to the laundry room, but I still did it after dinner when I’m all filled up and feeling slightly warmer inside my body.

I realized I actually underloaded the washing machine, because I separated my dark coloured and light coloured clothes. I loaded the dark coloured clothes and decided to stop making mistakes. Oh wells, I’ll just wear more light coloured clothes next week to accumulate them in the laundry.

Laundry is scary… especially when you have no idea if the colour would run on the dark coloured clothings… I feel like I’m experimenting life every second since I arrived in Brisbane.

Australians are super inefficient people.

When people tell me how laid back and slow a life of an Australian is, I didn’t think it would be that bad, until now.

I gave feedback about my lousy old heater to the college office 3 days ago, but nothing is fixed yet.

I submitted my internet connection form 3 days ago, and I’m still not connected.

Just an hour ago, I found out that a girl on my floor who moved in 2 days later than me got her internet up already. WHAT THE HELL!!!!

According to her, she went to the office for help to get her MAC address, and they conveniently set it up for her.

So, she advised me to ask the office tmr about my internet connection status.

This is soooo annoying.

I’ve also been asking around… according to the seniors in the college, the weather forecasted that it’s gonna get windy for the next few weeks, and today is probably the first day of the winds.

Suddenly I feel like I’ve underestimated the weather in Australia. It’s in fact a lot more temperamental than the skies of Singapore.

List of countries my new acquaintances are from:
1. Melbourne
2. Malaysia
3. Thailand
4. China
5. Canada
6. Germany
7. Scotland

Yea, the list gets pretty impressive as the days pass.

Oh! And apparently NOT ALL the shops close at 5pm in Australia.

In colleges, there are usually events and parties during the semester. And according to the seniors, these events and parties are all about getting drunk and thrashed. Yeps, it’s kinda worrying my dear mother. I had to assure and reassure her that I’m gonna practice Heap Loads of Self-Discipline to calm her nerves.

Anyways, normally from Thursday onwards until the weekend, pubs do open till really late, and that’s where everyone hangs out. Believe it or not, there are pubs in the school campus, which gets really packed when school starts.

Erm… if you’re lucky, my sweethearts in Singapore will probably find a new friend who can really hold her liquor when I return. (=

The Exception

Since I'm always seen as a person without troubles and I'm presumed to have a life of comfort, I'd be assumed to have no worries in life.

But they often fail to learn that the life of an adult is alot more complicated than a child. As one gains in age, the mind starts to get complex and creates problems on its own.

Therefore, don't think that I live a smooth-sailing life and that would make me the least worrisome person you know.

I've tried to suppress the feeling of being neglected once at home, which then blew up into frustrations and jealousy. And it seems like with my personality and character, I can never run away from situations like this.

When I finally feel like I found the person whom I can throw all my sorrows safely at, I had to leave that person for a long time. I am left with no choice but to hold back the pleasure it brings me to vomit all my discomfort out and learn to live my old life back.

This person pampered me with the habit of speaking my mind and not mindful of the consequences if anything gets leaked out because I know it will never happen. It's been wonderful knowing you, and yes, this honored person is an exception.

Thank you for being there.
I hope that we won't feel too distant the next time we meet and we can still remain close friends again.

P.S. This kinda sounds like a break-up.

Scars will trail behind (The Insignificant Soul)

For the past one month, I find myself drowning in disappointment caused by the people around me and to add on to that, I felt immersed in high-blood-pressure stress level because of my mother.

I don't blame my mother, because I can see her blood pressure soaring higher than mine as the departure date draws nearer. It came as a shock to her that I was really serious about studying abroad alone, and without getting mentally prepared in time for her daughter's first grown-up decision, she finds herself worrying about my basic survival necessities in Australia.

But I don't see any effort put in by the rest of the people around me. I feel myself surrounded in sheer superficial "Miss Yous" and meet-ups.
For one entire month, I realised how I was used as an excuse for gatherings and more gatherings, where my existence seemed unimportant.
Or if I was in any way important, I was there to keep things planned and organised so that everyone is fed and happy.

I don't see other people's farewells as servitude as mine.

Everyday, as I savour the solitude moments that have been so hard to come by lately, my mind would drift to the antagonising socialising work I've been trying to keep up with ever since I was planning to leave Australia.

I find it unbelievable that after so long, I still ended up feeling let down by the people whom I thought I could keep forever.
And when I look back, I realise that I had a part to play in the blame.
The non-existence of the word Trust landed me here, as I see the true colours of my life before leaving this made up world of my own.
In actual fact, I never trusted anyone, and nobody realised that that problem actually existed.

I've never poured my sorrows to anyone, neither has anyone tried to look here for a shoulder to cry on.
I am not the first person to share your joy with, neither are you the first person I wanna announce my good news to.

Whatever happened to the "I don't believe in Best Friends" theory I've been working on since Primary School. It seems that after I've learnt to change myself, I'm slowly forgetting the scars that were left by all those whom I thought I could trust, and thus, letting my guard down.
I've never let myself feel love from friends only until recently, when I got pricked which woke me into reality.

As I sit here alone, thinking back on all the bitter and sweet I've encountered in life, I realise that I've not told anyone the bitterness in my life, and I find myself holding back whenever I want to spread any good news. It's not that I don't wish to say anything, but many times, in order to prevent more trouble or best, status quo, I had to keep mum.

Just like now. By writing this, I'm making trouble for myself, but it's okay, because it's between me and each individual and I'm leaving already, so there won't be any more talkings to blow the matter up. Right?

So I asked myself, "Do these people actually know me?"

Now I finally saw the light of everything.

The farewell is for the girl who is always there when you need her. Just ring her up, say please and she'll turn up for all the bored souls who needs a companion.
Everyone must admit that I'm not a fun person to hang out with, so when I do get a call, they just needed more people to fill up the space, or otherwise, it would be that all the fun people are busy.

That's that.
They'll miss the "make-use-of" girl, whom they don't actually understand but they think they do.

All the "we really want you to be there" mentality makes me wonder if I'm being called up because it became a habit.
Because in so many occasions, I've tried and experimented: If I don't speak up and make any sound, will anyone notice?
Apparently, it's proven that No, no one noticed.

I wrote this a week before my departure, but I'm only posting it out now because I don't wanna see all the guilt-strickened, disappointed, sad faces like as if those faces are telling me that I should be guilty of feeling that way and I should really change my mindset.

Please do take a few moments and ponder. Do you really have no part to play in this whole ordeal I'm going through in my mind?

and whatever your answer is for that question, ask yourself: "Do you really know what kind of a person Sheena Ng really is?"

Whether your answer is a Yes or a No, it doesn't matter to me. Because right from the start of the entire Farewell Sheena Affair, I saw who are the ones who truly loves me as a friend and I sincerely appreciate everyone of them.

People may have saw the change in me, but they don't realise how the change made me distant and different.

As for those not in my list, just 2 more lines for all of you:

I'm sick of me giving and you not reciprocating because I'm not that magnanimous.
Therefore, I won't bother giving anymore unless there's a need to.

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Alright. Take in deep breaths and relax.

I've written this because I was too stressed up.
But that doesn't mean I don't mean what I say.

If it didn't matter then it wouldn't hurt so much.
So friends still mean alot to me, just in a different way.

And I'm sure nobody realised, but I've learned to live and forget since a looong time ago, and also, I dont think anybody really know that the line "Time will heal all wounds, scars will trail behind" really applies in my life.

(Although I know it's kinda impossible) Don't let the above passage bother you too much, as Time will solve everything. Wounds will definitely heal in time, but scars remain.

I don't know about you (apply to all readers) reading this, but I've become an optimistic person who cheers up in minutes.

That's something you learn about me. :)

An independent soul is what I've become right now.

That's why I say I don't need a farewell. It'd only make my already dreadful soul feel worse, but I'm not blaming anybody since I've never told anyone and nobody actually noticed.

This kid is good!

Yikes!

A 14 year old who has the moves!

Okays, I'm referring to the kid in the front at the start of the performance.
Freaking hell after I've watched the video, I don't believe that this kid is just 14 this year!
Korea stars debut really early these days...

I didn't know them before, but I went to wiki them straight after watching this video to find out who's that kid in the front.
This is what I found in wiki:

TAEMIN
Stage name: Taemin (태민 or 泰民)
Birth name: Lee Taemin (이태민)
Birth date: July 18, 1993(age 14)
Position: Lead Dancer, Vocal

This 14 year old kid w/o a picture in wiki is the lead dancer of Shinee (pronounced as Shiny - yes, koreans and their english...), which means it's that kid in the front of the formation, cuz judging from SM's habits, they ALWAYS put the lead dancer in the front, whether or not they can sing.
It applies to SuJu, TVXQ (and previously Shinhwa).

Anyways, this kid's dancing style reminds me of Eunhyuk/Donghae (and alittle Junsu). But also different at the same time..

Erm.... no. He does not remind me of Yunho at all because Yunho's dancing style is unique to his own. Period.

Oh, and I've finally come to terms with the rumours about Shinee being the new TVXQ from the "SM Super Star Factory".

Their Chris Brown performance is pretty tight. I can't deny that they probably have what it takes in the future to make it big like their sunbaes.

Haven't really heard them sing though, they might not be as good. Afterall, Junsu and Jaejoong are Vocal Powerhouses.
But I must say, the lead vocal of Shinee, Jonghyun (the kid who sang the most in this perf.) is pretty cute.
Other than that, the others should try re-styling themselves.